Pope headhunted by Satan
Pope Benedict XVI is leaving his post at the Vatican to work for the devil.
The Pope said it would be ‘interesting to work with so many homosexuals’
Joseph Ratzinger handed in his 30 days’ notice to God, telling a surprised deity that he would be taking up a key role with His arch-rival.
The Pope will become marketing director at Satan’s newly-founded Temple of Darkness, a global devil-worship brand.
He said: “Poping has been great fun and over the last eight years I have met a lot very strange people with some fascinating secrets.
“This isn’t about money, it’s about the creative challenge. I’ll be using my understanding of dogma to create a manifesto for a great new sin-based brand.
“Satan runs a fun, hip organisation – he’s like the Google of worship. There’ll be chilled out brainstorming sessions and loads of muffins.
“Also, I hate hymns, so it’ll be great to organise services where we listen to Cradle of Filth.
“And it will be nice to finally work for a company where I can say, ‘yeah, we’re supposed to do stuff like that’.”
He added: “Thanks to all the priests and nuns, I hope we stay in touch. Thanks to God – I couldn’t have done it without You. And of course, thanks to Tony and Cherie – you guys are mental!”
Satan said: “The Hitler Youth and the Vatican. I should be working for him.”
Posted on February 12, 2013, in International affairs, Nonsense, Religion and tagged Cradle of Filth, Google, Hitler Youth, Pope, Pope Benedict XVI, Pope Benedict xvi Retires, Religion, Satan, Vatican, Vatican City, Vatican News. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.
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