Irish Woman Has Talking Vagina
Maeve O’connell 31 discovered her talent after visiting the fabled Blarney Stone which legend says will grant the gift of speech to anyone who kisses it.
Before the visit she suffered from a terrible stutter and other speech impediments and the visit was to be her last chance of a normal life.
However, it rained heavily the night before and when Maeve approached the stone she slipped up and fell from the castle walls.
Fortunately she landed on a group of elderly visitors who broke her fall (at the cost of their own lives) but on the way down it is believed that her vagina gently brushed against the Blarney Stone and was therefore granted the gift of speech.
According to the local TV station, who did a one hour special on Mrs O’connell’s unusual talent, she still has the stutter but can speak clearly and fluently from the other end.
A book deal is believed to be in the pipeline together with a string of TV appearances and she has even been invited to sing for the queen during her forthcoming visit to the Emerald Isle.
In preparation for the big day it is understood that she has been spending time with a local gymnastic coach who is teaching her to walk on her hands.
The Irish Tourist board are also believed to be selling tickets to anyone who’d like to kiss it.
Posted on February 26, 2013, in Health, Ireland, Nonsense and tagged Blarney, Blarney Stone, County Waterford, Emerald Isle, Ireland, Irish News, News satire, Onion, Parody, Satire. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.